“You’re so stubborn.”
It’s a phrase I’ve heard more times than I can count. Growing up it was usually said in a very frustrated, exasperated tone by my parents or teachers or brothers.
It always made me feel like something was wrong with me.
To be fair, I always have been rather committed to doing things my own way and I’m not afraid of a passionate argument when I believe in something. The exasperation of those around me was probably justified more often than not! 🙂
However, over the years I have learned that the thing I thought was “wrong” and “bad” about me has actually been one of my biggest strengths. This stubbornness, which caused my parents so much frustration in my childhood, has pulled me through the most painful and challenging times of my life.
Sheer stubbornness kept me alive during years of depression and suicidal desires. That stubborn persistence kept me going through the devastating grief and sorrow after the deaths of my fiance and our daughter. My stubborn determination helped me create a beautiful and amazing life out of the ruins of grief, shame, shitty self-esteem, and loneliness.
The thing that I thought was wrong with me was the very thing that not just saved my life, but made it beautiful.
What is it about you that you think is “bad” or “wrong” or “broken?”
Fluid sense of time?
Head in the clouds-ness?
What if those exact traits are the things that save your life (literally or metaphorically)? What if those traits also hold the roots of your awesomeness?
Stubbornness can also be resilience and determination.
Selfishness can also be self-worth and self-valuing.
Quietness can also be an amazing ability to listen.
Having a fluid sense of time can also be the ability to adapt and be flexible.
Having your head in the clouds can also be brilliant creativity and innovation.
Having strong opinions can also be advocacy and a willingness to stand up for your own integrity.
That which we are told is our biggest weakness can, with the right perspective and choices, be our greatest strengths. That which we believe is wrong with us might just be what brings us back to our wholeness.
The thing you need to live your most amazing life is the very thing you already have.
Something to ponder 🙂